Meet Talya and Dave from Boston, Massachusetts

The couple met when they were 18 years old. Talya grew up in a pretty big family saturated with dysfunction. She began living on her own at 17. Dave grew up in an incredibly loving family with hardly a roof over his head. His family moved a lot. At one time they lived in, what he now understands, was just a shack deep in the woods. As a child, he recognized that his family lived in poverty but today he said, “We had so much love. I had pretty good childhood just being able to runaround all the time and play outside in nature.” When the two met they didn’t expect to know each other long. What they didn’t realize, until years later, is that they both struggled with “being enough.” Because of this, they had self-sabotaging and destructive behaviors that led them to the edge of losing almost everything- including each other. Once they had, metaphorically, burned their lives to the ground, they finally realized that they needed to change if they were going to break the cycle of generational trauma. They have three beautiful children and said, “We knew we had to stop living the life that we were living for the sake of our children. We cut out all substances and alcohol from our lives and began slowly picking up the pieces of the mess that we had created. We just got sick and tired of being sick and tired. We want to share our story in hopes that others can learn from our mistakes. We want to teach our children a better way of life and teach them the lessons that we have learned the hard way so that they will not make the same mistakes.” All of their self-reflection and hard work is finally paying off and moving them forward as a family. Dave recently received a promotion at his job where he is now a Technical Mechanical Trainer; a position that is new to the company that he works for. He’s honored to hold the position and understands the value and weight of being able to teach his team and future generations. The couple has been married for 20 years. They said, “With all that we have been through together it’s incredible that we made it. It was not easy, but it was definitely worth it.” Dave’s favorite thing about Talya is her unwavering dedication to their family. She is relentless in nurturing the growth of their love, healing, and connection. Talya’s favorite thing about Dave is his integrity and what a hard worker he is. She said, “He is not only putting in the hard work to change for the better for himself and his family, but he is also putting in the hard work to help others by giving back through his sobriety.” The one thing they want to tell the world is, “We know that there are so many people who are out there suffering in silence because they don’t feel like they measure up. They, too, may not feel like they are enough. Social media has its pros and cons. Remember when you’re scrolling through posts, what you’re looking at are perfectly tailored lives. People are only showing you what they want you to see. They are not showing you the demons that may live inside them. Your mess is your message. Stop comparing yourself to others. It’s important when you are sharing your story to be authentically you. The mental and emotional toolbox that we were working with did not have the solutions we needed to live a healthy life. We thought that we had to endure it alone in silence. We didn’t know that there was any other way to process our feelings, to be able to work through them, move beyond them, and rise to higher level. You are not alone. It’s okay to ask for help and there is no shame in that.” Dave and Talya, thank you so much for taking the time to share your inspiring story today. Keep on putting in the good work one day at a time. Thank you for visiting!