Meet Lindsay & Ethan from Upstate NY

Lindsay was born and raised in the Capital Region. Ethan is the driving force that saved Lindsay’s life. She grew up in a family that suffered generational trauma from alcoholism. While growing up, she watched her father and grandfather endure a long battles with alcoholism. She said, “As a young girl, I absolutely despised alcohol. I saw first-hand the effects it had on those I loved. I stayed as far away from it as I could. At 13 years old, my parents divorced. I struggled with feeling worthy enough and all of the trauma that comes with your family being ripped apart at such a critical age. At 16 years old, I had my first drink. When I drank it made the chaos and noise in my head stop. I started drinking to the point where I would blackout. I thought the drinking was making the noise and chaos stop but it was only getting louder. I met Ethan’s father when I was in high school. He had already graduated. I was 16 and he was 19. We met at a bar and alcohol was involved. I moved to California and eventually, I moved back home to New York. Upon returning home, I immediately got pregnant with Ethan. I can’t say that I’m a single mom because his dad is involved in his life but I am the sole provider in my home. It’s just Ethan and I. Just before I got pregnant with Ethan, I was attempting to live a sober life. I was 25 years old when I got pregnant. I didn’t know where to go or who to turn to so I asked my dad for help. My father was still drinking and remarried. He told me that he couldn’t help me and told me to reach out to my mom. My mom and I have always had a tumultuous relationship, but she took me in and helped me through the pregnancy. While I was pregnant with him and for 2 1/2 years, I lived a sober life. After giving birth postpartum depression hit me very hard. I turned to alcohol to numb the pain. In August of 2017, I went to rehab. When I came home from rehab, it was really my grandparents that stepped in and helped with Ethan. I work two jobs. I’m a security guard during the week and on the weekends I’m a waitress. As of August, I have been sober for eight years. When I first left rehab, I was going to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings 2 to 3 times a day. Now I am strong in my conviction of staying sober and I don’t need to lean on that support group as much. Today staying sober is a way of life.” Ethan is 8 and he loves geology and is fascinated with rocks with is what brought Lindsay & Ethan to Howe Caverns. His favorite subject in school is math although he would prefer to be outside and playing. He said, “My favorite thing about my Mom is that she loves me with her whole heart.” The one thing Lindsay wants to tell the world is, “No matter what, you do not need anyone else’s validation you live your life. The one person that you are going to spend the rest of your life with is going to be yourself. Be the person you want to come home to. Be your own best friend. When your mind is at war with itself, it’s the scariest and saddest place you’ll ever be. Never ever give up hope. Give yourself the love that you are seeking. Love yourself as if it was the way you would love another. Show yourself kindness, mercy and grace. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. You are only human. None of us have lived life before. We are all doing the best we can with what we’ve got.” Thank you Lindsay for visiting and sharing your story. May your years of sobriety take you to all places you’ve dreamed of. Keep rising!